Working on the copy edits of BAD PENNY today and passed the 75% mark to general rejoicing.
You normal folks may now go back to work. For you passionate grammarians, my fab copy editor marked a hundred uses of “then” in my manuscript.
No, I wasn’t having issues with the then/than confusion.
I was having issues when using “then” when tying two clauses together. The question: did I always have to use “and” with “then”?
EXAMPLE 1: “Frank backed out of the parking stall then rumbled out onto Dewar Drive.”
Was “then” naked without an accompanying “and”? Should I make it read as “Frank backed out of the parking stall and then rumbled onto Dewar Drive”?
And if it doesn’t need the full “and,” does it need at least a comma for a miniskirt so it reads “parking stall, then rumbled out onto . . .”?
EXAMPLE 2: “The tension ratcheted up, then Senor Zombie’s eyes slid to the side.”
Can you use “then” as a coordinating conjunction? Or must it always be used with “and,” as in “the tension ratcheted up, and then Senor Zombie’s slid to the side.”
I looked in the Chicago Manual of Style. I looked in Garner’s Modern American Usage. I could not find the answer. So I emailed Annette Lyon, author of There, Their, and They’re: A No-Tears Guide to Grammar From The Word Nerd.
Saint Annette’s response:
Your first example is correct as is, with no AND: “Frank backed out of the parking stall then rumbled out onto Dewar Drive.”
The only time you grammatically need AND before THEN is if we’re connecting two independent clauses, because THEN isn’t one of the conjunctions that can do that. You’ll find those in a text box in the book, and they include AND, OR, FOR, NOR, YET, BUT, SO.
The only issue in the above sentence is whether to use a comma before THEN. The current stylistic trend is to leave out the comma, so you can leave it just like you have it above. Some people balk at that and want the comma for the pause it provides. Depending on the house style guide, that may be something you can argue, or maybe it won’t be. Neither is really grammatically more correct; the comma before THEN is more of a style issue.
In the next example, we do need AND or some other conjunction from the list, because both sides of the sentence are independent clauses. So this would be wrong: “The tension ratcheted up, then Senor Zombie’s eyes slid to the side.”
But this would work: “The tension ratcheted up, and then Senor Zombie’s eyes slid to the side.”
To avoid the issue altogether, we can rephrase it. A couple of variations:
-The tension ratcheted up when Senor Zombie’s eyes slid to the side.
-Senor Zombie’s eyes slid to the side; the tension ratcheted up. (Semicolons replace conjunction + comma)
Rules of thumb:
-If you’ve got 2 independent clauses, don’t use THEN as the conjunction. Add AND or another one.
-It the sentence has just 1 independent clause, THEN is enough by itself.
Thank you, Annette.
And wouldn’t you know, I opened A Wanted Man by Lee Child, and what did I see? A bunch of then’s illustrating exactly what Ms. Lyon suggested.
“Reacher heard the roar of the shot, quieter than some, but still deafening in a closed room, and simultaneously he heard the wallboard explode above and behind his head, and then he hit the floor, knees first, then his hip, then his side, sprawling, down low behind the counter, out of sight.” (159)
I think all I’m going to see while reading for the next while are the then’s.
Okay John. Just stop it. October 13 is far enough away as it is.
My local bookstore is a bit confused and delivered it today. I’ve only read the first two chapters but I’m liking it so far.
Wow. If the phrase “no fair” ever applied, it is right now. However, to refrain from sounding childish, I’ll instead say, “Lucky!”
Oh, those naughty bookstores. Of course, Hezekiah, you could just drive down to Moab.
Readermom, I’ll be interested to see how it goes for you.
Hezekiah. You want some salt, buddy? Here’s one from a gal who got an early copy and posted to my Facebook.
“WOW! “Servant” is fabulous!!! It’s got everything! It’s complex, deep, full of symbolism and analogy. I could use it as coursework for a whole year of college English! And even a comparative current events class. And yet, it’s frenzied page turning entertainment! I have lost quite a few Z’s! I set aside at least an hour every night to read before bed, but it’s turned into 4-5 hrs! I woke up at 4:30 a.m. with my glasses askew, the bedroom light blaring in my eyes and the book resting peacefully at my side. It took me a moment to decide where I was. 🙂 But it has been worth every lost Z. And I am not even finished. I will be by tonight though! Thank you!!!!! Amy.”
They’re not all going to be like that (dang it). But it’s nice to know we hooked up the right book with the right reader in that case.
It burn! It burns!
I had an amazingly emotional response to the book. Usually I read for plot but the situations of the characters nearly brought me to tears. This probably has something to do with the fact that I am 4 months pregnant.
My husband read it and enjoyed it as well.
I like living in a town with a bookstore that doesn’t understand the concept of release dates.
Readermom, so happy to hear the experience was gripping. But you’re not alone. The woman who I quoted above finished a few days ago and, well, I won’t spoil anything for other readers, but had a similar experience. And she’s definitely not pregnant 🙂
I’d say the part that got me the most emotional was the scene between father and son. If you’ve read it, and didn’t at least get a little emotional, you must not have kids. That part tugged the old heart strings all right. It helps that my son’s only 5 months old, of course, but still.
Oh, and some more salt, Hezekiah. I got an advance copy over a month ago. Ouch, it burns.