Author: John Brown

  • Passed the 75% mark on the final draft of BAD PENNY

    ByJohn Brown

    Working on the copy edits of BAD PENNY today and passed the 75% mark to general rejoicing.

    You normal folks may now go back to work. For you passionate grammarians, my fab copy editor marked a hundred uses of “then” in my manuscript.

    No, I wasn’t having issues with the then/than confusion.  

    I was having issues when using “then” when tying two clauses together. The question: did I always have to use “and” with “then”?

    EXAMPLE 1: “Frank backed out of the parking stall then rumbled out onto Dewar Drive.”

    Was “then” naked without an accompanying “and”? Should I make it read as “Frank backed out of the parking stall and then rumbled onto Dewar Drive”?

    And if it doesn’t need the full “and,” does it need at least a comma for a miniskirt so it reads “parking stall, then rumbled out onto . . .”?

    EXAMPLE 2: “The tension ratcheted up, then Senor Zombie’s eyes slid to the side.”

    Can you use “then” as a coordinating conjunction? Or must it always be used with “and,” as in “the tension ratcheted up, and then Senor Zombie’s slid to the side.”

    I looked in the Chicago Manual of Style. I looked in Garner’s Modern American Usage. I could not find the answer. So I emailed Annette Lyon, author of There, Their, and They’re: A No-Tears Guide to Grammar From The Word Nerd.

    Saint Annette’s response:

    Your first example is correct as is, with no AND: “Frank backed out of the parking stall then rumbled out onto Dewar Drive.”

    The only time you grammatically need AND before THEN is if we’re connecting two independent clauses, because THEN isn’t one of the conjunctions that can do that. You’ll find those in a text box in the book, and they include AND, OR, FOR, NOR, YET, BUT, SO.

    The only issue in the above sentence is whether to use a comma before THEN. The current stylistic trend is to leave out the comma, so you can leave it just like you have it above. Some people balk at that and want the comma for the pause it provides. Depending on the house style guide, that may be something you can argue, or maybe it won’t be. Neither is really grammatically more correct; the comma before THEN is more of a style issue. 

    In the next example, we do need AND or some other conjunction from the list, because both sides of the sentence are independent clauses. So this would be wrong: “The tension ratcheted up, then Senor Zombie’s eyes slid to the side.”

    But this would work: “The tension ratcheted up, and then Senor Zombie’s eyes slid to the side.”

    To avoid the issue altogether, we can rephrase it. A couple of variations:

    -The tension ratcheted up when Senor Zombie’s eyes slid to the side.

    -Senor Zombie’s eyes slid to the side; the tension ratcheted up. (Semicolons replace conjunction + comma)

    Rules of thumb:

    -If you’ve got 2 independent clauses, don’t use THEN as the conjunction. Add AND or another one.

    -It the sentence has just 1 independent clause, THEN is enough by itself.

    Thank you, Annette.

    And wouldn’t you know, I opened A Wanted Man by Lee Child, and what did I see? A bunch of then’s illustrating exactly what Ms. Lyon suggested.

    “Reacher heard the roar of the shot, quieter than some, but still deafening in a closed room, and simultaneously he heard the wallboard explode above and behind his head, and then he hit the floor, knees first, then his hip, then his side, sprawling, down low behind the counter, out of sight.” (159)

    I think all I’m going to see while reading for the next while are the then’s.

  • What I’m looking for from SFWA

    ByJohn Brown

    SFWA has asked M.C.A. Hogarth to head up the new self-publishing committee. Hogarth posted about this and asks:

    So here’s my question for those of you who self-publish, either entirely or as a hybrid author: what services would you look for in a professional organization? What would make you say, “Wow, that’s worth $90 a year, sign me up?”

    I applaud SFWA’s move. And the many good things SFWA has done in the past. However, as an indie and SFWA member, here’s what would interest me: Business.

    That’s with a big B.

    That means . . .

    Distribution into brick and mortar venues. So indie authors can get on the Ingram’s catalog. Big whoop. The retailer still has to order. If SFWA was able to facilitate the sales function in some way, that alone would be worth it.

    One idea is a SFWA catalog of vetted work. I don’t know how you’d vet. Maybe some certain sales and revenue level. And revenue would have to be part of it. Brick and Mortar isn’t going to be interested in stocking the person who “sold” 50,000 units but only made $300 because 99% of them were free downloads.

    You might also consider the back lists of authors with work that was once published that has been brought back indie style. So a catalog of that includes new stuff and a section for the back list. Quality and popular indie work.

    BTW, this catalog would ALSO go to libraries.

    Education in cover design AND art direction. Maybe adding this to an awards category chosen NOT by the general membership but art pros.

    The Nebulas recognize author’s who sell. But what about recognizing those who are author-publishers, what about recognizing and celebrating quality and achievement in the key elements of publishing?

    Education in Marketing that has actually been tested and shows positive ROI. Not a bunch of articles about bookmarks and conventions. Real ROI.

    Interior formatting. Principles. Awards.

    News. What’s new on the indie front. New markets etc.

    Selling foreign rights as an indie with and without an agent.

    What about an award like RWA’s Golden Heart, but for indie books? Or make indies more inclusive in the Nebulas.

    A vendor forum where folks who provide services to indie authors (editors, artists, etc) can be listed and rated, GoodReads style, but only by SFWA members.

    And two things I have submitted to SFWA before as a trad pub author.

    Education and discussion of contracts and contract terms. What’s current. What’s alarming. I get more off of Kris Rusch’s blog than the professional organization I belong to. I should be giving my $90 bucks to Kris. What the heck?

    Education and discussion of current contract rates. Same as above. For a professional organization to not have data on current rates for novels is a real head-scratcher.

    How is it that Tobias Buckell can run a survey, but it never occurs to SFWA to survey and publish annual numbers?

    How is it that Brenda Hiatt, the romance writer who does an annual “Show Me The Money” and “Indie Earnings” report, provides more info on Tor advances than SFWA? Romance writers are better organized than any writing group on the planet, but do they need to spank us in our own house?

    These last two are no-brainers.

    This is a trade organization. These types of things would be a HUGE help.

  • The line edit of Servant is finished!

    ByJohn Brown

    116 hours.

    677 pages.

    184,000 words.

    I re-sequenced the beginning and three other spots that had me scratching my head on how the first edition had gotten it wrong. I added a chapter to the ending to make it flow as it should. And tightened small things on almost every other page.

    Now it’s off to my copy editors.

    The cover is progressing.

    Very soon, Precious. Very soon.

    I now turn to the editing of CURSE. 

     

  • New book description for SERVANT

    ByJohn Brown

    Here’s the latest version of the book description that will accompany the book on the various sites and on the back cover of the trade paperback. It’s purpose is to advertise: to let folks know the feel of the book and pique their interest.

    A young man.

    The girl he is hunting for using the dark and terrifying magic of Slethery.

    And the monster who only wants to be free.

    So begins the towering fantasy series that introduces an elaborate new world, a multifaceted system of magic, and a cast of compelling characters and creatures.

    Trapped in a web of lies and ancient secrets, of right becoming wrong, the three must struggle not only against each other, but also a being of irresistible powers. A creature who is gathering her servants to oversee the impending human harvest.

    If the three win, they will save those they love the most. If they fail, the clans of the land fall with them.

    What people are saying:

    ~ Best Novel of the Year Whitney Awards, speculative fiction
    ~ Engrossing Publishers Weekly
    ~ Provocative Booklist
    ~ Starred Review! Library Journal
    ~ A great setting, a smart story Brandon Sanderson

    Do you think you can do better? See anything to cut? Have some book descriptions you think work really well? If so, comment. I’d love to see what you come up with.