Time for some Dark God voting

Folks, I’m trying to decide between 2 book descriptions for SERVANT. Tell me which one appeals to you more.

OPTION A

The spirited blacksmith’s daughter accused of using the dark and terrifying sleth magic.

The young man who hunts her. 

And the ferocious monster who only wants to be free.

Trapped in a web of lies and ancient secrets, of right becoming wrong, the three must struggle not only against each other, but also a being of irresistible powers. A creature who is gathering her servants to usher in the impending human harvest.

If the three succeed, they will save those they love the most. If they fail, the clans of the land fall with them.

OPTION B

Sugar, the blacksmith’s daughter, is on the run, accused of using the chilling sleth magic.

Talen is determined to catch her, not only to get the bounty on her head, but to clear his people from her guilt.

But his plans go awry when a terrifying creature of grass and stone begins to stalk the clan lands. A creature that is somehow tied to those both Sugar and Talen hold dear. A creature sent by the dark Mother, the true master of the land, to both find the seed she planted in a woman’s womb a number of years ago and kill all those who might oppose her. 

At odds and trapped in a web of ancient secrets, lies, and lore, Talen and Sugar must struggle to find the truth. But will they be able to uncover a way to fight back and save their loved ones before the Mother finds the one she bred to be her scepter and return her to power? The one bred to become lord and usher in the impending human harvest.

Let the voting begin.

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  • Servant cover art

    The cover illustration for SERVANT is finished!

    (and there was much rejoicing.)

    yea.

    Actually, there was DANCING. Because I think the final piece rocks. The artist is Victor Minguez. Here are two of his pieces that I really enjoy.

    The first is “Angel.” I love the bright contrast, the face, and the fact that there’s so much rich detail.

    The next is “Champagne Havoc.” Again, a wonderful face, but also an awesome idea (a robot carrying a woman in the palm of its hand), and then the lines and chopper give the whole piece a lot of energy.

    Click here to see other works in his portfolio.

    So we kicked the project off by me sharing the goals I had for the cover and tons of reference on everything from color scheme to character costume. I asked Victor to develop some concepts for an ensemble of Hunger, Sugar, and Talen as well as some for the cave scene towards the end of the book. He came back with these sketches.

    Servant Sketch 1 cave Servant Sketch 2 horse ensemble

    Servant Sketch 3 ensemble Servant Sketch 4 cave

    I liked the first because it would allow us to see the figure’s faces more clearly. And there was a lot of interesting detail with the cave. Look at the roots by the entrance. I also liked the structure. I liked the third because it included Hunger, and Victor was taking Hunger in a new direction. I also thought we could do some neat things with the energy of Sugar on the horse and that long sash. The fourth one, however, just felt right. It had so much potential energy. I was immediately drawn to the body language. And so this is the one we decided to develop.  Then one of my beta art viewers suggested moving closer and putting in more strong diagonals. It was a perfect idea. Victor agreed and came back with this.

     

    Servant WIP 1

    I liked the lines of her stance but wondered if she needed something stronger with her legs. Victor adjusted, but my idea just wasn’t an improvement.

    Servant WIP 2

    So we decided to stick with the previous version. However, this was all too dark. Way too much gray. When looking at things in thumbnail, the cover has to pop. I shared more reference images. And Victor went back and delivered this.

    Servant WIP 3

    Boom! That was exactly what I was looking for. Bright, dynamic. However, we needed a more neutral bit at the top for the title and author’s name. And the brightest spot had to be behind Sugar to draw the eye to her. Here was the next version.

    Servant WIP 4

    At this point I started to dance. This was IT! There was a lot going on here. We had the high contrast I wanted. We had the energy. The wind with the hair and leaves and sash and torch all add kinetic energy. As do all the diagonals. Notice as well the cave details–we have hints at previous habitation, runes, and some interesting contrast with the dark foreground. I had shared a number of N.C. Wyeth and Tim and Greg Hildebrandt pieces as reference, and I think this captured elements of those and gave them a new twist. Note as well the sharp projections on Sugar’s behind. Victor put them in there purely for aesthetic reasons. He had no idea what they were. I loved them. He loved them. They worked. We would just have to make them make sense.

    After a few more iterations, he delivered the final.

    Servant Final

    I think it’s gorgeous. And will advertise the book perfectly. In a few days I will reveal the final cover with title etc. Shortly after that, SERVANT will be available again to please English readers worldwide.

     

     

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  • Believe In Me, Cyber War

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    Back in 1964, Jim Keith took a job at an Oklahoma high school to coach boy’s basketball.  But when he arrived, the administrators changed their minds and gave his job to someone else.  Keith’s contract didn’t specify which gender he’d coach, just that he’d coach.  So they switched him to the girls.  Keith was extremely disappointed.  Who wanted to coach girls when it was the boys who played real ball?  Especially when Keith was supposed to be head coach.  Keith tried to get the promised position back, except the girls he coached had other things in store for him.  Harold Keith, Jim’s brother, wrote a novel based on what happened.  That novel was made into a movie in 2006 called Believe In Me.  

    Now, we all know the plot line of sports movies: a losing underdog of a team rises up to win.  It’s predictable, right?  But we could say that of all crime shows as well—in this episode investigators discover a crime and figure out who did it!  Wow, what a shocker.  We could say it of all romantic comedies as well—in this movie a couple at odds gets together.  No way!  We could say it of lots of stories.  And yet we love these stories anyway.  Why?  

    Because the characters suck us in.  Because the story tellers do such a good job with the particular details we forget we’re watching a movie or reading a book.  We forget to think about the ending.  Furthermore, the stories are often about more than just winning games.  And so we worry about these people who have become real to us and focus on their immediate situation.  At least, that’s what happens when the story tellers do a good job.

    And Robert Collector, who both wrote and directed the film, did a great job with Believe In Me.  Now, I don’t know how accurate the film’s depiction of five-on-five play is; I believe the girl basketball teams of that era played six-on-six.  But that’s a niggling technical detail.  Besides, the movie isn’t about technique anyway.  It’s about a man and a group of country girls who have to face difficult obstacles, not so much on the court, but off it.  If you have girls or like sports at all, I think you’ll love this movie. 

    Cyber War

    I recently reviewed America The Vulnerable which explained how exposed we are as individuals, corporations, and a country to cyber crime, cyber espionage (both state and corporate), and cyber attacks.  Of all the cyber threats we face as individuals and a nation, the least likely is an all out cyber war.  But just because it’s less likely that doesn’t mean the threat isn’t real.  Especially since cyber warfare has been in use since the 1990’s.  We used cyber weapons openly in the gulf war in 2003, knocking out Iraqi air defenses.  Israel used them to own Syria’s air defenses when bombing their clandestine nuclear site in 2007.  Russia used them against Estonia in 2008 and Georgia in 2009 on a variety of targets, bringing many critical systems to a halt.  In 2010, somebody, most likely the US or Israel, developed the Stuxnet worm to sabotage the uranium enrichment facility at Natanz in Iran.  China has already conducted trial runs of cyber attacks on the US and has planted logic bombs and trap doors to activate in the future.

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    And Clarke knows his stuff.  He worked for the State Department during the presidency of Ronald Reagan.  In 1992, President George H.W. Bush appointed him to chair the Counter-terrorism Security Group and to a seat on the United States National Security Council.  President Bill Clinton retained Clarke and in 1998 promoted him to be the national coordinator for security, infrastructure protection, and counterterrorism, the chief counterterrorism adviser on the National Security Council.  President George W. Bush kept him in the same position and later made him special adviser to the president on cyber security.    

    The thing I liked most about the book is that in addition to describing cool cyber war weapons, threats, and incidents, Clarke examines answers to many critical questions.  For example, how can we set up a defense without the government becoming a 1984 nightmare?  Would arms agreements work in cyber space?  (No.)  How do you prevent a cyber war from turning into a kinetic (guns and troops) war?  How do you attack your enemy when it’s sometimes hard to know who launched the attack in the first place?  He discusses these and many more questions.

    The book does have one fault.  Clarke has an obvious axe to grind with the Bush administration, and can’t help but make snide and irritating comments whenever he brings them up.  The good news is that those spots are few and far between.  If you want an excellent introduction into how cyber weapons are used and will likely be used in the future, you’ll want to read this book.

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  • Awful Intent Update: Chapter 26

    I have now moved from the struggle into the resolution. It’s all down hill from here.  I expect the novel to be 70-80k words. The shortest novel I’ve written yet. But I always seem to add on most of my revisions. I hope to keep it shorter, but we’ll see.

    Now you may ask, hey, how does that compare with other thrillers? Well, here are the lengths of a few of James Patterson’s.

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  • CONduit report & some interesting numbers

    CONduit is a conference for speculative fiction writers. This year’s conference was great. I was able to see and talk to a bunch of writer friends (Dave Wolverton, Dan Wells, Brandon Sanderson, Howard & Sandra Tayler, Eric James Stone, Ami Chopine, Darren Egget, Skipper Ritchotte, Mette Harrison), make some new ones (Lee Modesitt, James Dashner, Julie Wright, Aprilynne Pike, Larry Correia), plus chat with a multitude of others who are trying to break in. I also got to record with the Dragon Crawlers Radio guys. Nothing better than spending a weekend with a swarm of friendly and talented folks.

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    • James Dashner is going to be one of the main events from Random House this fall. I’m expecting an equally large print of his Maze Runner.
    • Brandon Sanderson just signed a contract that was announced on Publisher’s Lunch for somewhere around 2.5 million for four books. Folks, this is amazingly large for our genre.

    Of course, we already know Dave Wolverton and Lee Modesitt are some of the biggest sellers for Tor. Dan Wells is going to be big as well. And the Taylers have already got tens of thousands who read them regularly. They threw a great release party at this con.

    Larry Correia has had some interesting success as well and came at it from a side alley. He self-published Monster Hunters International. He sold a few thousand copies (no mean feat, especially for a self-published book), with many of the readers coming from the armed forces in Afganistan and Iraq. The book was so good the owner of a large independent store in Minnesota, Uncle Hugo’s, called the editor of Baen Books up and told her that she was an idiot if she didn’t buy Larry’s book because he could sell the heck out of it. So she took a look, agreed, and Larry’s now under contract with a real publisher. It’s coming out in July.

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    • 4,000 hardback copies for a title in a year is the rough break even point for Tor. You sell more than that, you’re okay. You sell less and Tor might have to drop you.
    • 10,000 hardback copies would be considered a very good seller.
    • 15,000 – 30,000 hardback copies and you are hitting the top of the midlist
    • Robert Jordan sold around 600,000 of each of his titles in hardback.
    • Depending on the time of year, 4,000 – 5,000 hardbacks sold in a week will put you in the top ten, even the top three, on the NY Times bestseller list.

    As for me, I printed up some posters and book marks using Swanland’s art. The cover got a great reaction there. And that’s huge for me because, looking at that Gallup Poll blog I wrote, the cover is going to drive a lot of sales for a new author. I had a wonderful time giving my workshop. And I think I finally figured out which part of my novel I can use for readers. Oh, and if you get a chance to hear Eric James Stone read any of his short stories, take it. I’ve listened to him twice now and both have been well worth the 20 minutes.

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14 Comments

  1. Votes counted! Thanks.

    ND, it’s coming. Everything is ready. It would have been out last week but I ran into InDesign issues.

  2. I actually prefer the first two lines of B, but the final paragraphs of A? I prefer names, but I think the lack of detail in the final paragraphs of A work better. Maybe use three sentences from B, then finish with the last two paragraphs of A.

  3. Vote coutned, Mike. Sorry for the slow comment approval. Thanks for the interesting suggestion.

  4. I vote B. More descriptive and I prefer the use of names. It also has a more impactful ending; the ending of A seems a bit lacking by comparison – we don’t know the clans so why should we care about them? I agree with Ben though, that B could still be tightened up a bit. In particular the last sentence of the third paragraph. I’d lose ‘both’, ‘a number of years go’, and ‘all’.
    Hope that helps John, and that I’m not too late!

  5. Tim,

    Never too late. This is a description and can be easily changed 🙂 Thanks so much for voting! And the suggestions. Those are good cuts.

    I will say that the total voting here and from a couple of other places has been in favor of the shorter version by a margin of almost 2 to 1. It was neck and neck in the beginning, but the shorter one is winning out.

  6. Lol! Ha. Black Friday is indeed a good day. I’m just waiting to review the proof of the paperback. That’s the last thing. I was hoping to have it today. The ebook is up on Amazon, but I didn’t want to announce until everything was ready because that’s when I’ll be doing my big Black Friday sale price. If you can’t wait, go get it now. But if you can keep yourself from eating the marshmellow, you’ll get a better price next week.

    BTW, we’ve started the cover for Curse. I also hope to have the final for Bad Penny early next week. This first time through has taken me longer than I estimated it would. But it should be smoother sailing now that we know what we’re doing on the publishing end.

  7. I could not wait, I just bought Servant for $2.99. It was nice to see your beautiful new cover art on amazon.com !

    Now, here’s hoping Curse is out in time for Christmas!

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