Good Stuff! A Different Kind of Prom

ByJohn Brown

The first time I attended a high school prom in Rich County, I thought the Rich County people were from another planet.

I was married. My wife Nellie had grown up in Rich County, and said that we had to go to her little brother’s prom.

“Your brother’s prom?” I asked. Like, what?

“Yes, my brother’s prom.”

Weird, I thought. Because in the big city, older brothers and sisters who have graduated simply do not go to high school proms.

But I’m always up for strange new experiences, and so we went.

And I can report that it was indeed strange. In the big city, grandma and grandpa do not attend the prom, nor do mom and dad or little brothers and sisters. And they most assuredly do not sit in the stands and watch the junior class perform a dance.

But that’s what they did in Rich County. And so I sat next to grandma and grandpa who were nigh unto eighty years old and watched an announcer present the junior class. There was a makeshift stage. And the announcer would announce the names of a young woman and a young man. On the stage, the young woman would take the arm of a young man, and then he would escort her out to the center of the floor to the applause of everyone in the gym. The couple would then perform a little action—he might twirl her, or she him, or she might jump in his arms, or he in hers, or she might lift her dress enough to show she was wearing cowboy boots that matched his, or dozens of other little creative things, and then they’d walk to the side to make room for the next couple.

In Rich County, there are only forty or so kids in a class, so it didn’t take long. When the juniors were all announced, the whole junior class, in their tuxes and dresses, spread out and took their places on the floor. A song began to play, and then they performed a dance that had been choreographed specifically for the occasion.

When it finished, the mother or father of each junior went out onto the floor and danced a slow dance with their son or daughter.

They then presented the seniors in the same way, after which the parents of the seniors went out and danced with their sons and daughters.

Only when that dance ended did the lights dim and the “normal” dancing begin. Nellie and I danced a few songs, and then she said it was time for us to get some refreshments and go.

And that’s what we did, leaving the teens to their evening.

I had never before seen anything like it. I laughed and wondered. Those funny hicks, I thought.

I took a job in San Francisco for a few years, then another in Columbus, Ohio. And then, years after that hick prom, Nellie and I moved from the big city to Rich County. That was almost thirteen years ago.

This last Friday I watched as my third daughter was announced and walked down from the makeshift stage. She was escorted by a young man, looking handsome in his tux. I watched him twirl her and another girl (he got to escort two). And when all the seniors had been presented, I got to dance with my girl at the prom.

I cannot tell you how sweet that was to look in her eyes, to see my little girl grown up into this beautiful, strong woman. I thought about how she was soon going to leave us, and tears threatened to spring into this papa’s eyes, but she smiled and said, “Don’t you dare.”

What’s a man to do? I obeyed. And instead of blubbering, we danced.

When we finished, I gave her a hug and a kiss on the forehead and returned to the stands.

I’ve danced six times with my girls at these Rich County proms—once when each was a junior and once when they were seniors. And I love this tradition.

I love that a huge part of the community comes out to the dance. I love that we honor and applaud these great kids. I love watching the juniors in their gorgeous dresses and handsome tuxes perform these beautiful, formal dances that remind me of something you might find in Victorian England, something that seems to have stepped right out of Pride and Prejudice.

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Juniors performing dance
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Parents dancing with kids

What an excellent evening.

How lucky I am that places like Rich County exist, and that I get to live in one of them.

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  • Good Stuff! 2 Sauces You Don’t Want to Miss

    ByJohn Brown

    What have the Dutch got that we ain’t got?

    Well, besides signs like this.

    geenhondenpoepopdestoep

    Which is frequently accompanied by the words “Geen Honden Poep Op De Stoep”(no dog poop on the sidewalk).

    I’ll tell you what they have—easy access to sambal oelek (SAHM-bal OO-lek). Sambal oelek is Indonesian for “dang good chili paste.”


     SambalOelek

    And why I started this post with the dog sign, I don’t know. Probably not the best lead in for food. But put that out of your mind now.

    You have avoided the dog, and are now sitting down to a delicious meal. And it’s been made even more delicious because you used sambal oelek. “Sambal” means something like “condiment” or “sauce.” There are a lot of different sambals, of course.  Oelek refers to a type of Indonesian stone mortar and pestle used to grind things. So a rough translation is ground sauce.

    And this sauce/paste is awesome. Now, I’m not a spicy foods guy. In fact, whenever we eat out, and I’m asked how spicy I want my food, I always choose mild. I hate super spicy food. But sometimes a little spice can transform a dish.

    You want to perk up your stir fry? Sambal oelek.

    You want to refresh your scrambled eggs? Sambal oelek.

    You want to try a new kind of PBJ? Sambal oelek.

    A spicy PBJ? Oh, baby.

    I was introduced to this BPJ when I was on my mission in the Netherlands. BTW, it’s not by accident I became of fan of Indonesian food while on my mission. Indonesia used to be a Dutch colony, and so there are tons of Indonesians there. For almost a year, I lived in rooms rented out of the houses of Indonesian landladies who cooked our lunches or dinners for us.

    So one day I watched one of my fellow missionaries spread sambal onto a piece of bread, then follow with peanut butter and a touch of jelly. At the time, I was grossed out. Then I tried it.

    Have you ever had satay? It’s the Thai and Indonesian version of BBQ. It usually comes with this marvelous spicy-sweet peanut butter sauce. If you have, you know you love it. And this, well, this is what you call the sambal PBJ variation of satay.

    If you like Thai, you’ll love this stuff.

    So where did I find it?

    World Market.

    And if you don’t have one close, you can get it on Amazon. Yeah.

    But, wait. There’s another mild hot sauce that you don’t want to miss.

    My two daughters just returned from their missions. One went to Kentucky. At the end of her mission, she was teamed up with one Sister Barajas from Mexico and assigned to work Spanish-speaking folks. And Sister Barajas introduced her to Cholula.

    Cholula

    Heavenly Cholula. Not too spicy. No weird taste like Tobasco.

    You want to perk up your stir fry? Cholula.

    You want to refresh your scrambled eggs? More Cholula.

    You want to try a new kind of PBJ? I don’t know. I haven’t tried that yet. But it’s good on steamed veggies. Good just about anywhere you want a fine little zing.

    Where can you find it?

    Walmart.

    How easy is that.

    If you like mild spice, the little bottle with a wooden top is going to become your friend.

    Okay, so what if you don’t like sauces?

    cafe_zupas

    How about a great soup and sandwich. Here’s the freebie recommendation. If you live close to a Cafe Zupas (Arizona, Idaho, Nevada, Utah), try to new Roasted Veggie and Quinoa soup along with a sandwich. I had the California Turkey. It was delicious. It comes with a little bit of French bread and a chocolate dipped strawberry.

    Life is good.

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  • Thai Crystal, Rothfuss, Daily Life in the Middle Ages, Perot Charts

    ByJohn Brown

    Thai Crystal Stick - Large, 4.2 ozI don’t like anti-perspirants because they gob up in the underarms of my undershirts. Which means I eventually go walking about with pebbles in my pits. And, yes, we do have a washing machine and use it regularly. There’s something in there that defies anything less than hydro-chloric acid.

    I don’t like deodorants because they wimp out on me. I’ll put on my bracing Speedstick in the morning and be sniffing myself by lunch. And if I put some industrial perfume on it only leads to rashes.

    Someone might be saying that I should just be a real man and smell like a real man smells. But how about I be a real, smart man. See, if you’ve got dog poo in your carpet, you wouldn’t spray it with cologne, hoping to deal with the smell. No, you go to the source. Clean up the stuff and forego all the scents. In fact, if you keep the dog from pooping in the first place, you’re ahead of the game. So why not do the same with underarm odors? Just get rid of the stinkers.

    Well, that’s what I did. Many years ago I found out that natural mineral salts kill underarm bacteria. If the underarm bacteria can’t exist, let alone breed and excrete, then you don’t get underarm odor. What’s more, you can get those mineral salts in “rock” form. Just wet and wipe under your arms and you’re done. It works just like regular anti-perspirant and deodorant, it’s just that you’re delivery bacteria killers instead of perfumes.

    Another good thing about mineral salt deodrant rocks is that they last a LONG time. And I mean looooong. My last rock took about 4 years to use up (heads up all you one-year’s supply people). The problem with them is that you can’t find the rocks in the grocery store next to the big brands. But you CAN find them in health stories. I got my latest from Shangri-lah in Logan. The brand is Thai Crystal (named after the location where the US companies discovered this method of deodorizing).

    Folks, it’s 3:09 PM. I just did the sniff test–aah, the sweet smell of nothing!

    *

    The Name of the Wind (The Kingkiller Chronicle, Day 1)I heard all the hype about Rothfuss and picked up his The Name of the Wind  in a Hastings book shop. The first few pages didn’t grab me and so I put it back. But then I kept hearing the hype. I finally decided, okay, okay, I’ll give it a go.

    By “go” I mean something like five pages. See, I’m impatient with books. If you can’t grab me by the bottom of page one, I’m outta there. I read too many stories in my undergrad program that bored me to the very last page. Sometime after I graduated (why did I wait so long?) I realized that I could increase the odds of reading something interesting me if I only read things that interested me. (You only arrive at this level of brilliance after many years in college.)

    I’m not going to overview the plot here. Just know it’s a fabulous read. For you writers, note that what drives the reader’s suspense is not an overarching plot, but his situation of being alone and destitute. So while there are villains, that really isn’t what keeps the reader going. It’s the wonder of a new place and our hope for this kid.

    *

    Daily Life in the Middle AgesI read more non-fiction than I do fiction each year. I need to so that I have something to say in my writing. And I will tell you that I haven’t found a finer source of cool ideas to huck into stories than Paul Newman’s (no, not the actor cum cookie man) Daily Life in the Middle Ages.

    He breaks up medieval life into topics like Eating and Cooking, Building and Housing, Clothing and Dressing, etc. It’s full of wonderful stuff.

    Did you know that they played football back in old England? Not sissy European style, but hog style, like rugby or American football. Except it was often between two towns and the playing field was miles long.

    Did you know that respectable women wore hats? Those who let their hair go free were young girls and prostitutes. And that if a man knocked a woman’s headdress off it was tantamount to accusing her of prostitution and might result in the woman’s husband or family taking the man to court to exhonorate her. 

    Did you know that the word “curfew” came from the old French “covre feu,” meaning “cover the fire.” Since open flames were such a fire hazard in the old cities, many towns had regulations that required people to douse their lights and carefully bank their fires at a certain time in the evening which was often marked by the tolling of bells.

    I pulled these beauties out just randomly flipping through the pages. The book is full of such delights and you can be sure many of these will be finding their way into my stories.

    *

    I didn’t vote for Ross Perot the first time. I certainly wouldn’t vote for him now. But James Maxey just pointed me to an excellent on-line explanation of the current government budget. It’s worth your time to check this out to be able to understand what folks are talking about when it comes to our money and how Congress spends it. The charts are narrated, compelling, non-partisan, and incredibly easy to follow. Here are more Perot Chart presentations.  

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    Slush I Read by Jim C. Hines

    ByJohn Brown

    Laughs are lovely. I just came across this wonderful parody by novelist Jim C. Hines which will give you a few for free. Enjoy!

    Slush I Read
    by Jim C. Hines

    (Apologies to Seuss)

    I read slush.
    Slush I read.

    That slush I read.
    That slush I read!
    I do not like that slush I read.

    Do you like fanfic with vamps?

    I do not like them Mary Sue.
    Why do these vamps all worship you?

    Here’s a tale from D & D!

    I do not want your D & D.
    I do not like your elf PC.
    I can not stand your purple prose.
    I want to punch you in the nose!

    Would you like a hot sex scene?
    I wrote it for my online ‘zine!

    Go to Hines’ site and read the rest right now

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  • The Meth Epidemic, The Marines

    ByJohn Brown

    The Meth Epidemic

    Mamphetamine is the most addictive illegal drug in America. Unlike marijuana, cocaine, or heroin, all of which are synthesized from easy-to-obtain plant material (cannabis, cocoa leaf, opium poppy), meth requires ephedrine or pseudoephedrine, which are very complex to make and require a lot of know-how and high-tech processing. The only folks who have that ability are legitimate chemical factories. In fact, there are less than a dozen such factories around the world that produce these chemicals. Which means it should be easy to stop illegal use at the source.

    “Should” is the key word there.

    When you’re trying to halt drug trafficking, you can work two sides. There’s the demand side and the supply side.

    When you work on the demand side, you try to affect people’s desire and use.  For example, in the 1960’s the Federal Trade Commission, along with other government agencies and private groups, began a campaign against tobacco. Using government policy, public awareness, and education over the last forty years, these groups have significantly altered demand for tobacco in the United States. In 1963 more than half the nation smoked. 4,345 cigarettes were consumed per capita. But as these groups worked to affect demand, those numbers dropped steadily until by 2006 only 1,619 cigarettes were consumed per capita.

    That’s astounding, folks. A whole culture was changed.

    When you work on the supply side, you try to reduce the production and distribution of drugs. This can sometimes be almost impossible to do. For example, almost anyone can grow marijuana. And it takes very little knowledge to harvest and package the parts that are used.  Same with alcohol–home brewing has been practiced for ages. In both examples, the ingredients are easy to obtain and the processing is relatively simple and easy to hide.

    But there are some drugs that are very difficult to produce. The key ingredient for barbiturates is one. In the 1950’s and 1960’s barbiturate abuse was increasing. But the government instituted some regulations on the legitimate businesses that produced these ingredients, and it reduced the amount available on the streets until we very seldom hear of barbiturates being used these days.

    So where does meth fit in? Well, as I stated above, there are less than a dozen factories that create the key ingredients. Meth is a perfect candidate for supply side intervention. Unfortunately, regulation isn’t as easy as it may seem.

    PBS’s Frontline recently aired “The Meth Epidemic” which explains the history of meth in the United States and the battle raging over its cure. If you’ve ever wondered about what meth is and how it affects our nation, you’ll want to watch this. I think you’ll find it eye-opening and well worth your time. Watch it for free here: http://video.pbs.org/video/1933783731.  

    The Marines

    The US Marine Corps is a fascinating organization with special capabilities. With the exception of the Coast Guard, they are the smallest of the United States’ armed forces, although they’re still bigger than the entire British army. Part of what makes the Marines unique is that they have the ability to rapidly deploy an independent task force (infantry, air support, ships) to almost anywhere in the world within days. Because of this, they are usually the first boots on the ground in any engagement. They pave the way and the Army and other branches follow to provide overwhelming and continuous force.

    But the differences include more than their mission. The Marine Corps emphasizes authority and responsibility downward to a greater degree than the other military services. It members are, on average, younger. And its creed “Every Marine’s a Rifleman” has special implications for its commanders and troops.

    In order to do some research for a novel I’m writing, I’ve been watching a lot of documentaries about special operations forces and the Marines. One of the best introductions to the Marines I’ve come across is the 2007 PBS documentary called The Marines. It examines what it takes to become a Marine and what it truly means to be one, outlining the rigorous training process that each recruit must endure to become a commissioned officer. I found it fascinating.

    If you have ever been curious what makes the Marines different from the other branches of the military and what it takes to become one, you’ll want to watch this film. I couldn’t find it on the PBS site, but you can find it split into 10 parts at YouTube.com. Just go to site and search for “pbs the marines”.

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  • Best Buy, Samsung, and Sony

    ByJohn Brown

    I am not an early adopter. I do not rush out to buy the latest and greatest of anything. If I have something that works, then I keep using it until it absolutely won’t work anymore.

    For example, Nellie and I bought a Honda Accord when we were first married. Fourteen years later, we had put almost 300,000 miles on that car and would have tried to put on another 300,000. Unfortunately, it met an early demise when it encountered a herd of black Angus cattle on a very dark country road at one a.m. in the morning. So long, brave companion.

    We have a computer we purchased thirteen years ago which is still running Windows 98. Computers evolve about as quickly as fruit flies, which means that in human years our computer is like 450 years old. This is like going to war with first-generation muskets while everyone else is using Predator drones. And we’re okay with that, even though it appears we’re going to have to retire the old fellow this year.  Alas.

    I have these fine olive green dress pants that are fifteen years old. When the rise finally wore out, I had Nellie fix it.  She put in a bright Kermit-The-Frog green patch, which draws a lot of attention to an area that’s been down-played ever since the codpiece went out of fashion in the late 1500’s. Was this sweet revenge for eating her stash of chocolate? Or a cleverly planned source of constant enjoyment? I do not know. But as a result, I do not wear these pants to church and important business meetings. I wear them hiking. They protect me from bushes and mosquitoes, yet breathe with perfection. Why would I ever get rid of them?

    As you can see, I’m not a buy buy buy guy. Which means that when I get something it better darn well be a fine product because I know I’m likely to be using it for a very long time. And this brings me to our recent television and blu-ray player purchase. Two years ago some friends who had just purchased a big flat screen TV saw that we were still using our twenty-three year old 15″ RCA, took pity on us and gave us the 21″ TV they were replacing. It is one of those big suckers that weighs 475 pounds, but still a fine TV, and we watched it with joy.

    However, a few weeks ago our antenna converter box broke. Our church’s semi-annual worldwide conference was coming up, which is a feast we love to watch, and so we were faced with choice: buy another converter box or pay a few more dollars and move into the twenty-first century with a flat screen. Now, while it’s true I’m not a buy buy buy guy, it is also true that I have been longing for a manly TV lo these many years. This was my chance. When Nellie agreed we should look for a new TV, I went into immediate action.

    We started our search at Best Buy. The sales guys there were incredibly helpful. But we wanted to shop a bit more. So we went to a discount club, and thinking we’d save thirty bucks, purchased our TV there. We took it home, and I did not like it. I looked up the reviews on Consumer Reports and liked it even less. So I took it back. Sam’s has a great return policy, and gave us a full refund. Good bye, piece of crap.

    I went to Best Buy again. After talking with the floor guy there for some time, I purchased a 32″ Samsung LN32D Series 4. No, it’s not 60 inches of gorilla manliness, but a 32″ TV does have a bit of hair on its chest. And it was bigger than what we’d been using. And it was only a few hundred bucks. I found this TV’s picture much better. Excellent, in fact, with the TV stations. However, my DVDs didn’t play so well on it.

    I took it back to Best Buy. The folks there spent an hour testing other TVs and demonstrating that the issue was not the TV but my old Sony DVD player which could only use RCA cables. I needed a new player with the new HDMI cable, which is able to deliver much better quality. So I purchased one, a blu-ray player, brought it home, and found that the picture was indeed much better, but I hated the player’s remote controls. For example, I want to push one button to bring up the disc menu. I do not want to click options, over, down, down, down to do this each time.

    I took it back. The folks at Best Buy were as friendly and helpful as ever. There was no hassle returning it. We spent another thirty minutes test driving different players and their remotes. I finally settled on a Sony BDP-5390 which is fabulous, not only because the remote and on-screen controls were helpful and it remembers where I was with movies I don’t finish, but also because it has a number of apps that allow me to connect to my wi-fi and watch things like YouTube, listen to internet radio, and pipe music all through my house.  There are so many cool features that I’m going to be enjoying discovering them all for a number of weeks. In all of this, the folks at Best Buy were cheerful, helpful, knowledgeable, and willing to work with someone who was very particular in what he wanted. I am now a Best Buy believer. If you want excellent customer service and good prices, go to Best Buy. I’ll be going back there for my next TV . . . when this one has racked up two gajillion viewing hours and at last gives up the ghost.

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  • The Story Behind “Amazing Grace”

    ByJohn Brown

    John Newton writes the following about himself.

    “My father was a very sensible, and a moral man, as the world rates morality; but neither he, nor my step-mother, was under the impressions of religion: I was, therefore, much left to myself, to mingle with idle and wicked boys; and soon learnt their ways.”

    And learn them he did, and not just from wicked boys.  This is the John Newton who worked aboard a “respectable” slave ship and then became the captain of his own.  But this is also the John Newton who later wrote “Amazing Grace,” probably the most famous of all folk hymns.

    That song has been sung in countless arrangements and to different tunes. I love the version by The Five Blind Boys of Alabama sung to the music of “The House of the Rising Sun”.  Soulful.  Incredible.

    And the fabulous mash up of those two same songs performed by Jerry Lawson And The Talk Of The Town on NBC’s The Sing-Off season 2.

    And the more traditional version featured on the movie Amazing Grace sung by Chris Tomlin and titled “Amazing Grace (my chains are gone)”.

    There are simply too many wonderful versions to list.

    But what makes this song so wonderful is not only the words, but also the story behind the song.  This song isn’t a song of theology—it’s John Newton’s own heartfelt expression of gratitude to God, who helped him turn from his profane and wicked life and eventually fight against the ills he practiced.  Later in life, Newton became a supporter and inspiration to William Wilberforce who lead the fight to pass the British Slave Trade Act in 1807, which abolished the slave trade in that empire.

    Although the experience of Newton’s turning point is dramatic, and referred to in the song, his change didn’t occur over night.  In fact, it took him a number of years to fully come to himself.   It was 34 years AFTER he retired from slavery, which was years AFTER he turned toward a new life, that he published his forceful pamphlet Thoughts Upon the Slave Trade, in which he describes the horrific conditions of the slave ships and apologizes for a confession that “comes too late” and “will always be a subject of humiliating reflection to me, that I was once an active instrument in a business at which my heart now shudders.”

    My heart soars when seeing someone turn a life around (maybe because I’m in need of a turnaround).  It’s such a wonderful and instructive tale of hope.

    Recently, Asbury University Media Com students and an Asbury Art Dept student under the direction of Professor Greg Bandy produced a short 14 minute documentary called Amazing Grace: The Story Behind the Song on the fascinating story of how John Newton wrote the most famous hymn in the world . . . and helped bring about one of the most powerful social justice movements in the history of Western Civilization.  It’s a great tale.  Watch it below.

    Amazing Grace: The Story Behind the Song from Gregory Bandy on Vimeo.

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5 Comments

  1. Thanks John, often times we take for granted circumstances that are common to us until we are forced or choose to do without! My four daughters are grown and on their own now and oh how I miss this type of interaction with them. As we grow older I believe “Tradition” does become more important!

  2. As a Rich High Graduate, ’88 to be exact, I have often mentioned the quirky style of prom that we had there. I now live in a bigger city(not to much bigger but bigger) and I wish that the kids,and parents, here could experience the fun in having the whole family there. I never got the experience of dancing with my daughter at prom. Thanks so much for bringing a flood of memories back to me this morning. Great Article.

  3. I grew up in Rich County and had the privilege of being part of this wonderful Prom tradition. I have since moved away to a place that does nothing of the sort, and when I told my own daughters of the dance we all had to learn and that most of the community attended to watch said dance be performed they just looked at me dumbfounded. Prom in Rich County is something very special and I am so glad to know that the tradition continues so many years later.

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